Jon Stewart nails GOP "bipartisanship"

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Ted Cruz is the Hypocrite of the Day

"[The new filibuster rule] will poison the atmosphere of the Senate."

 —Senator Ted Cruz (Republican, Texas)

Hypocrisy, thy name is Mitch McConnell

As you know, the Democrats voted to change the Senate procedure to “majority rule” for executive branch and judicial nominees. Why’d they do this? Because of Senator Mitch McConnell (Republican, Kentucky) and his G.O.P. colleagues, who routinely reject any Obama nominee because, well, they are Obama nominees.

And now that the Senate rules have changed, McConnell is spitting mad! Which is kind of odd, given that he said this back in 2005.

“I think the president is entitled to an up-or-down--that is simple majority--vote on nominations, both to his Cabinet and to the executive branch and also to the judiciary. The filibuster was not used for 200 years. The country did just fine. Sometimes the court would jag off to the left, and sometimes it would slide over to the right. Presidents trying to mold the Supreme Court is nothing new. It's not inappropriate. And we need to get back to tradition, and the tradition is a majority is enough to confirm a judge.”

But once a Democrat was elected president, all bets were off! During Obama’s presidency, there’ve been 81 cloture motions – attempts at defeating a filibuster.

In just Obama’s first five years he got clotured more than all the other presidents combined since filibusters of judicial and executive branch nominees began in 1968. Prior to Obama, cloture was invoked 68 times total. Obama? 81!

In 2005, McConnell explained why these clotures were rare:

“What typically happens is we exercise self-restraint, and we do not engage in that kind of behavior because invoking certain obstructionist tactics would upset the Senate's unwritten rules.”

Rand Paul just got his ass—and credibility—handed to him by Jon Stewart

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That motherfucker.

“It’s time to put the partisan bickering aside and fund the vital services we all support, maintain our credit rating, and continue the debate about the damage Obamacare is doing to the economy. Sen. Cruz has fully supported individual measures to fund essential government services and to take responsible action to reduce our debt. The President and all members of Congress should send an unmistakable signal that the United States will not default on its debt. We should not put our credit ratings in jeopardy over our political disputes." 

—Catherine Frazier, Press Secretary for Senator Ted Cruz

Constitutionally Unsound

Republicans love to make a show of how they carry around the U.S. Constitution in their pocket. That's how much they love it! Which makes this morning's headline jarring:

Yes, the party that espouses financial responsibility is considering defaulting on our nation's debt. (And never mind that Wall Street and the Chamber of Commerce oppose this path.) But this is the really amazing part—that would be a violation of the Constitution. Check it:

United States Constitution: 14th Amendment, Section 4.
The validity of the public debt of the United States, authorized by law, including debts incurred for payment of pensions and bounties for services in suppressing insurrection or rebellion, shall not be questioned.

So, which is it?

“This isn't some damn game!”
—House Speaker John Boehner 

“We’re going to win this.”
—Senator Rand Paul (Republican, Kentucky), talking to Mitch McConnell on a hit mike. (Of course, we know who's losing—this eight-year-old cancer patient who can't get treatment with the FDA shutdown.)

Wyoming Republicans: The Most Hypocritical Americans

Republicans love to trumpet how they're all about small government and shrinking budgets. So let's take a look at which states have the highest proportion of government employees. You'll find that in the top left of the chart below.

Hello, Wyoming. And look, there's lots of other Republican controlled states in there too! In fact, when you look at different ways that state governments take up space, you'll notice a preponderance of GOP influence in ALL these categories.

Moral: Those lying motherfuckers!

Donald Rumsfeld is the Small Mind of the Day

Former Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld called Barack Obama “the so-called commander in chief”?

What a jerk.

But I love this additional quote:

“[President Obama] doesn’t have the kind of support that President Bush had in respect to his military actions.”

*applause*