Andy Borowitz is onto something

Here's the start of his on-target piece; see the rest at the New Yorker.

Republicans Accuse Obama of Using Position as President to Lead Country 

Responding to reports that President Obama is considering signing as many as nineteen executive orders on gun control, Republicans in Congress unleashed a blistering attack on him today, accusing Mr. Obama of “cynically and systematically using his position as President to lead the country.” 

Spearheading the offensive was Rep. Steve Stockman (R-Texas), who charged the President with the “wanton exploitation of powers that are legally granted to him under the U.S. Constitution.”

Calling him the “Law Professor-in-Chief,” Rep. Stockman accused Mr. Obama of “manipulating a little-known section of the Constitution,” Article II, which outlines the power of the President.

If you're a Tea Partier, this is hysterical

Ah, but since you're appalled, I guess you're a human. Steve Stockman (Republican senatorial candidate, Texas) is selling these bumper stickers.

Texas needs MORE Republicans like Ted Cruz? But it already has them!

Texas is so full of crazy, it’s only a matter of time before it swings back to sanity. Right? Gail Collins has a nice rundown of the recent disgraces of Texas’ Republican politicians—and it doesn’t even include Senator Ted Cruz!

Representative Louie Gohmert angry that John McCain didn’t support the government shutdown, said McCain “supported Al Qaeda” in Syria. (McCain brushed it off, because “if someone has no intelligence, I don’t view it as being a malicious statement.”)

Representative Steve Stockman, accusing the president and House Democrats of “curb-stomping veterans.”

Representative John Culberson crying “Let’s roll!” in the move to shut down the government (and invoking the battle cry against 9/11 terrorists.

Representative Pete Sessions, who summed things up rather neatly with: “We’re not French. We don’t surrender.”

Lt. Gov. David Dewhurst: “I don’t know about you, but Barack Obama ought to be impeached [sic].”

Greg Abbott, Texas attorney general and gubernatorial candidate, on the attorney general’s duties: “I go into the office, I sue the federal government, and then I go home.” (Photo via.)