Is that a pocket pistol in your bathrobe, or...? Oh, it is. Never mind.

To preserve one’s sanity, it’s best to side-step the right-wing media. However, today I made an exception for The Daily Caller (run by the less-than-charming Tucker Carlson and the always-vile Betsy Rothstein). It ran a piece yesterday titled"Concealed Carry Tactics to Neutralize a Home Invasion."

How does one avoid such a nightmare? By having a gun on one’s person AT ALL TIMES:

This very realistic photo ran with the article.

Small, lightweight and extremely convenient, pocket pistols can be carried in many different ways and adapted to practically any style of dress, from your normal street clothes to a bathrobe. For maximum comfort and speed of access, they can be openly carried in a belt holster. If family “sensitivities” don’t allow that, the holstered pistol can be covered with a sweater.

Also, consider these factors when looking at your home:

“Wargame” your [house]. Take a hard look at the angles of fire available to you and identify areas where your rounds might endanger family members or neighbors. Look for solid backstops that will contain rounds that might miss or over-penetrate. At the same time, look for shooting positions that offer you the advantage of cover or concealment, or look for obstacles that would restrict an invader’s access to you. When you identify these prime defensive locations, consider stashing an extra magazine or speedloader there so, if practical, you can have extra reloads available if you need them.

And THAT, boys and girls, is why I have an arsenal in my pantry. (Right next to the Triscuits.)

Tucker Carlson fell asleep on "Fox & Friends"?

So many jokes come to mind...but let's just keep quiet and not wake him.

Why does Tucker Carlson compares Charles and David Koch to Satan?

David Koch

Billionaire right-wingers Charles and David Koch run an oil, chemical and consumer products conglomerate. They’re also pretty terrible people. The Washington Post has a terrific article up titled Billionaire Koch brothers use Web to take on media reports they dispute.”

If the Kochs have a Public Enemy No. 1 in the media, it is most assuredly Jane Mayer. [She] has been on the company’s radar since the New Yorker published her 10,000-word investigation of the Kochs’ philanthropic and political activities in August 2010. 

The article, titled “Covert Operations,” detailed the Kochs’ financial support of a network of conservative-libertarian think tanks and organizations. The Kochs were so incensed by the article’s suggestion that their activities were “secretive” and designed for personal enrichment that the normally press-averse David Koch gave several interviews. In one, he denounced Mayer’s article as “hateful.” The New Yorker stood by its story. 

When Mayer’s article became a finalist for a National Magazine Award in early 2011, Koch Industries took the unusual step of writing to the award’s sponsor, the American Society of Magazine Editors, to object. “Her article is ideologically slanted and a prime example of a disturbing trend in journalism, where agenda-driven advocacy masquerades as objective reporting,” wrote Koch attorney Mark V. Holden... “Given these facts, it would be inappropriate for ASME to give Ms. Mayer’s article an award in Reporting.”

She lost. More?

KochFacts [a Koch brothers propaganda mouthpiece] now denounces Mayer even before her stories appear. In a posting May 18, the Web site predicted that a forthcoming Mayer article (about David Koch’s involvement in public television) “will be another attempt to smear us while advancing her partisan agenda.” But that was just a guess; as the anonymous author of the post admitted, “We don’t precisely know the content of her story.” 

Next, a Koch conspirator tries to leak a story that Mayer is a plagiarist to the Daily Caller.

…Tucker Carlson, the Daily Caller’s editor in chief, said in an interview that he doesn’t remember who gave his Web site the original tip about Mayer. But Carlson said the source is immaterial. “Every story idea winds up with an agenda behind it,” he said. “I’d be happy to take a story from Satan himself as long as it was true.”

Yes, you read that right. Conservative bow-tie wearer Tucker Carlson likened the Koch brothers to Satan. Since I'm a secular humanist, I'm going to assume that's just a metaphor, though.