Mitch McConnell: "He's for guns, freedom and coal."

Guns? Coal? A pithier campaign line for McConnell would be "He's anti-civilization."

Mitch McConnell just got SERVED!

"Let's tell it like it is. If the doctors told Senator McConnell he had a kidney stone, he wouldn't pass it." 

—Alison Lundergran Grimes

What rhymes with "Seeking an end to McConnell's slime"?

Alison Lundergan Grimes is the Kentucky secretary of state. And she's decided to run against Sen. Mitch McConnell (Republican) for his seat this year.

I was surprised to hear McConnell respond to this challenge with atypical class: 

"Accepting the invitation from countless Washington liberals to become President Obama's Kentucky candidate was a courageous decision by Alison Lundergan Grimes and I look forward to a respectful exchange of ideas."

I should have known better. McConnell's campaign quickly threw up a video ad ("What rhymes with Alison Lundergan Grimes?") attacking Grimes as, among other things, "a left wing mime." Which makes no sense, because a mime is silent, but the ad features plenty of sampling (and autotuning) of Grimes' public appearances.

But already, new lyrics are being suggested. My two favorites:

What rhymes with Grimes? 


Her opponent's years behind the times.

What rhymes with Mitch? 


He Autotuned her vocal pitch.


What rhymes with Mitch?
That slimy little son of a… gun!